I can't share the exact date....and to be honest we don't really know the exact date....but we recently celebrated Kai's birthday. It was a bittersweet day filled with a wide range of emotions. It felt very odd preparing a party for a little guy we've never met and can't pick up or hold. But despite the fact that he is half way around the world....and that he doesn't even know we exist...God has put a love for Kai in our hearts that is so real...so tangible...and so passionate.
We celebrated with family with some delicious cupcakes and some surprise gifts from my mom. At the end of the evening my heart was filled with joy knowing that God chose me to be Kai's mommy.....and my heart was filled with heartache knowing that it would be several more months before I could hold my sweet boy.
Dear Kai.
On your first birthday I may not be with you.
But I can still rejoice.
I can celebrate your life.
And I can pray.
My wish for you is that someday you will know...
that you are wanted
you were fought for
you are loved.
My prayer for you is that God would fill your heart with the knowledge
that you are precious
you are His
and that we are coming for you!
I pray that your nannies would hold you while I can't
and care for you until I can.
I love you deeply sweet boy.
I cannot wait to have you home!!
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